• Jitters

    How to Calm the ‘Hello’ Jitters

    Getting ready for your first live conversation with someone you’ve met on an online dating website can give even the coolest, most confident person the jitters. As soon as you pick up the phone and say “hello,” you rip away that comforting mask of anonymity that protects you during the initial phase of online dating. Once you make that first phone call, you lose the lag time you enjoyed during email and texting contacts that gave you time to think about what you were going to say before you pushed “send” and provided a reassuring safety net against sounding stupid. When you come to that all-important first phone call, your relationship suddenly goes live and you’re performing without a net!

    To calm the “hello” jitters and give yourself the best possible chance for dating success, try these online dating tips:

    1. Dress for success. Before you pick up the phone, do a little sprucing up. Put on an outfit that makes you feel attractive. Freshen your lipstick or run a razor over your chin. Spritz on some cologne and brush your hair. Sure, it sounds ridiculous. Your online date isn’t going to see you, so why bother? It’s all psychological. When you know you look good, you feel and sound more confident. That self confidence will come through over the phone.
    2. Skip the cheesy pickup lines. Be yourself. It’s even OK to admit that you’re a little nervous. Most dates find that endearing and preferable to blustering bravado.
    3. Be honest and genuine. If you and your online date are going to forge a relationship, best to base it on who you really are. Being caught in a lie is a certain relationship killer.
    4. Conversation is a two-way street. Don’t monopolize the conversation or steal the spotlight. You and your date should have equal opportunities to ask and answer questions or share views.

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