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    Ultimate Online Dating Profile Examples

    Online dating is the most ruthlessly efficient modern method of meeting new people and finding potential matches. If you follow the online dating profile examples we’ve laid out you will be much more likely to succeed.

    You know that the online dating statistics show that almost ½ the adult population in the U.S. has tried online dating and that more relationships start with online dating than people finding each other at work, a bar or church.

    Follow these simple online dating profile examples and you will have a much better chance at online dating success.

     

    Table of Contents:

    10 Surprising Facts About Online Dating Profiles

    Online Dating Mindset

    Your Online Dating Photo is Critical

    Camera Technique

    No Selfies

    Composition

    Your Smile: To Smile or Not to Smile

    No Group Shots

    Wardrobe

    No “Arty “ Shots

    The Setting and Style

    The Written Profile

    The Headline

    Online dating profile “Hooks”

    Be Specific

    Keep it Light

    Avoid Gripes

    Dating Etiquette

    Don’t be a Comedian

    Spelling and Grammar Count

    The Online Dating Site Questionnaire:

    Best Dating Profile Examples for Men

    Online Dating Profile Samples

    Conversation Starters for Guys

    Know When to Quit

    Best Dating Profile Example for Women

    Don’t Get Scammed

    Intentional Scams

    Online Dating Company Scams

    Dating for Fun & Profit Scams

    Conclusion

    About the Author:

     

    10 Surprising Facts About Online Dating Profiles

    Here are a couple of points to keep in mind before you start online dating from Claire Bahn, CEO of Online Profile Pros:

    • “Online dating is a full-contact sport and your best and only tool is your online dating profile”
    • “Online dating is all about how you market yourself from the images you choose to show, to your written profile. A good profile will get you the first phase and from there you need to learn how to close the deal with excellent conversation starters”
    • You get what you pay for: Free online dating sites have the worst scams and the least serious people because they don’t even care enough to invest in a monthly subscription. Pick up to 3 online dating sites and buy a subscription if you’re serious about finding a great match.
    • Online dating sites are simply marketplaces, so you need to market yourself effectively to be successful
    • Cameras are better at capturing emotion that you give them credit for. So, make sure you’re feeling good and confident and you’ll end up with better photos too.
    • “There are simple dating rules you can follow to make sure you are getting the most out of online dating and not getting scammed”
    • More people in your area = more opportunity. The major online dating sites are most effective in larger population centers. In less populated areas you might find more success with niche dating sites
    • Jump in with both feet. Online dating is a numbers game. The more people you contact, the higher your response rate. If you send out 10 contact requests a day, you should start seeing some action before the end of the week.
    • Nothing ventured, nothing gained. Online dating takes your ego out of the equation. If you overreach and get shot down, no one is going to see you crash and burn; so go for it. You have nothing to lose and everything to gain.
    • Don’t act like a fool. Not everyone you contact will decide to contact you. If you don’t get a response, no matter how interested you are in the person, DO NOT pester them with another contact request. When someone doesn’t respond you have to get over it and move on. Be realistic, you haven’t even met the person. There’s no emotional investment. Stop beating a dead horse. There are thousands of other daters online.

     

    Online Dating Stats

    Online Dating Mindset

    You need to understand the benefits and challenges of online dating to be successful whether you’re looking just to date for fun or find a life partner. Key to much of this is to develop the right mindset that will allow you to enjoy the experience and the adventure of meeting new people while also maintaining a sense of humor when things go a little slower than you like or seem to come off the rails completely.

    Online dating sites are essentially very efficient marketplaces where people come together the connect. Like any marketplace (and not to be too cold-hearted) it’s all about how you market yourself will determine the types of response you get. Unfortunately, the only tools you have to work with are your online dating photos and your online dating written profile.

    To paraphrase the former CEO of eHarmony, Grant Langston, “Online dating can be incredibly fun and adventurous if you’re willing to have some flexibility on whom you meet and have a good sense of what you have to offer”

    What does all this mean? It means that to get the most out of online dating you should not be too rigid in exactly whom you’re willing to meet with. They might not be your perfect ideal but you shouldn’t go into the process thinking to yourself that you’re only going to go out with “Supermodels”. Just because you’re paying for access to an online dating site does not mean that they will guarantee you that the most attractive people in your area on their site will pay attention to you at all.

    Which brings us to the other point. People date on parity. In other words, they tend to date people that they perceive to be roughly close to their equals; Looks, Education, Wealth, Social standing, etc. These rules can be broken but it usually breaks across the money and attractiveness scales more often than not. What does that mean exactly? It means that Less attractive with more wealth can attract more attractive with less wealthy people. It’s not “fair” but then searching for a match/mate has never been fair.

    If you can understand this and take a hard look at what you “bring to the table”, you will be a lot less disappointed with Online dating. It will also inform you of the Online dating profile examples you need to follow. You take a hard look at yourself and decide how you fit in the Looks, Education, Wealth, Social standing scales so you know whom you have parity with and whom you should approach.

    If you’re a bit stymied, then you can always use an impartial AI Photo analysis to give you some feedback on your attractiveness and other attributes. We’ve found that in general you might be able to engage people almost 2 points ahead of you on the attractiveness scale if your online dating profile is following the examples.

    Online Profile Pros Infographic:

     

    Online Profile Pros infographic

     

    Your Online Dating Photo is Critical

    When you’re dating your profile photo is the most critical aspect of your profile since people make a snap decision to connect with you based solely on their first impression which is usually made in less than three seconds.

    Online dating sites have analyzed the millions of photos in their database to see which ones are the most effective. Analysis from both eHarmony and Match.com showed very clear results. They are quick to tell you what should and shouldn’t be in the photo; whether to smile (yes, you should) and other important information. However, they don’t tell you exactly how to make a winning profile photo.

    So what makes a great dating profile photo?

    There are several aspects both in terms of photographic technique, as well as posing, style and attitude that form the basis of the best dating profile photo. In our experience the best dating profile photos our essentially well lit, formal portraiture in a lifestyle setting. So what does this mean? These are the aspects of a perfect online dating photo:

    • Lighting
    • Posing
    • Rule of thirds
    • Bokeh / Depth of Field
    • Headroom/composition
    • The Setting
    • The Style
    • Wardrobe
    • Eye Contact
    • To smile or not to smile, that is the question

     

    Camera Technique:

    A better camera will produce better images it is possible to get some quality images with even a smartphone. If you do decide to go the cheap route and use your smartphone for your profile photo consider the following: the very nature of the smartphone lens means that the closer it is to your face The flatter and wider your face will look especially your nose. Therefore, it’s advantageous to try to find a friend or someone who can take a good photo of you from a little distance even if they need to zoom in slightly the quality will be acceptable.

     

    There is no question that the way your photo is lit can have a huge impact on the quality of the photo as well as the perception of the subject in the photo. No matter how artistically inclined you are, dark, moody lighting, while it might look “cool“, tends not to be as inviting as a well-lit photo. There are ways to stand out from the crowded field of profile photos without resorting to lighting tricks or mood shots.

    There are some camera techniques that are especially effective for portraits and dating profile photos. These include using bokeh and the Rule of Thirds in order to come up with the most pleasing images.

    At the very least you should understand the concept of the rule of thirds. Many cameras today actually have a “grid“ that is a functional method of defining the Rule of Thirds. It consists of 2  sets of intersecting lines that look like a Tic-Tac-Toe board. In the rule of thirds, when you look at the grid the top two intersecting lines are where you want to put your subjects’ eyes. In other words, you want to compose the image of your subject so that their eyes are positioned at either of these 2 intersecting points and not always in the dead center of the frame.

    In addition, a common technique that literally focuses attention on the subject and nothing else is the use of Bokeh or otherwise known as Depth of Field. In essence you manipulate the camera so that the subject’s eyes, face and at least part of their body are in focus while the background and foreground are slightly blurred. There are multiple ways to achieve this as it is a combination of aperture, focus and lighting. There’s a standard technique for a professional photographer in order to draw attention to the subject.

    eharmony.com Online dating profile photo

    No Selfies:

    People frequently think that they can get away with just taking a selfie and it will make a great online dating photo. Nothing could be further from the truth

    A selfie sends the wrong message entirely. A selfie sends the message that you don’t really care that much and you’re just testing things out, you’re not serious or worse you’re so special that you don’t have the time to take it seriously and everyone should overlook that and just want to meet you because your “great” either way it’s not a very good look.

    Think about it this way, you’re scrolling through your online dating site looking a row after row of thumbnail images of people that meet your criteria. Side by side you see two thumbnails, ones a selfie of what could be a cute persona but its kind of dark and the persons face is a bit distorted and then right next to it is a beautiful image of a cute person, well lit, the persona is well dressed and looks like they put some thought into how they look and what the photo says about them. Whom do you think is going to get clicked on the most? That’s why online daters who want to successfully take their online dating profiles seriously and put some effort into them. They are the ones with all the dates.

    There are a ton of studies that talk about how a selfie portrays you to others. It might have been cute a few years ago but that fad has passed. Your online dating profile photo is the first impression most people have of you. What do you want them to see? Not a half-ass photo, that’s for sure. Your selfie sends the wrong message every time.

    A selfie says you’re too lazy to get even a friend to shoot a couple of photos of you…or worse you don’t even have any friends that would help you out. At the very least it says that the whole online dating thing and trying to find a relationship is really not all that important to you and you couldn’t be bothered. Is that really the message you want to send?

     

    Composition:

    While they are many ways of composing an image in order to draw attention to the subject, the most effective composition for an online dating photo is a more formal portrait stating around the subject’s chest and extending to about 2 inches above the subject’s head. Remember to use sufficient bokeh to blur the background so as to keep the focus on the subject, especially the subject eyes. This can easily be confused with a “head shot“, however, there are subtle differences.

    If you frame the subject so that the majority of the image constitutes the subject’s face and part of their upper chest making particularly sure that the eyes are in focus, this will create a pleasing composition. You do not want to include a full-body or even a three-quarter body shot in your primary dating profile photo because, as a thumbnail image, your head and face will be so small that it will be difficult to make an impression on the people viewing your dating profile photo. Basically, if they cannot see your face and eyes then it rarely leaves a positive first impression.

    The composition also includes whether the subject is looking directly at the camera or away from the camera in some fashion. In our experience and based on over a decade of helping people create the perfect online dating profile we find that except in very rare circumstances having the subject look directly at the camera and engaging with the viewer with eye contact is much more effective.

    Your Smile: To Smile or Not to Smile

    Another important consideration for your online dating profile photo is the question of “to smile or not to smile“.

    Again, based on our experience the point of your online profile photo is to make a great first impression which encourages another individual to make contact with you or to accept your invitation for a conversation. In order to do this it’s better to be more approachable than “cool“.

    Yes, studies show that a smile is better than no smile. You don’t need to make it over-exaggerated or crazy, but a nice little smile is warm and friendly and will give people the right impression. I mean, you want people to like you and communicate with you, right? Or else, why would you bother with an online dating site?

    To be honest, I know plenty of people who practice their smiles in front of a mirror before a shoot. Many models do the same thing. There’s no shame in making an effort to look your best. If you really want to take it over the top, you can learn to “smize.”

    Tyra Banks, the famous supermodel, and businesswoman coined the phrase “smile with your eyes” and later shortened it to “smize.” If you want to take your profile picture to the next level, you can learn to smize here.

    Wired online dating Guide

     

    No Group Shots

    Where’s Waldo is a game for children. It has no place in online dating. Your primary online dating profile photo should be of just you and you alone. Don’t use a picture with your best friend, sister mother father or even your dog.

    For God’s sake, don’t use a picture with your child (I have nothing against your kid but they don’t belong in your online dating profile photo) or your hot friend who’s better looking than you. The focus should be on you and only you. Any friends, family or dependents can be brought up if you decide to engage with someone. Initially it is just about 2 people connecting and nothing more.

    Wardrobe:

    Last but not least is the question of a wardrobe. We always tell people to dress for their photo shoot as if they are going on a first date so that they have the most becoming online dating profile photo.

    While you might be incredibly casual in your real life, your online dating profile photo is your first impression and therefore you need to make a good one. For whatever reason a casual wardrobe in your online dating profile photos usually come off as slovenly or unkept which is not the impression you want to make. You always want to look like you put in some effort and that you were taking your online dating seriously.

    No “Arty “ Shots

    No matter how creative and avantgarde you are, this may not be the best time to show off your “Arty” side. The reason is simple without context the first impression you make on another person in a virtual “line up” of dating thumbnails might very well be negative; which doom you’re online dating experience from the start.

    If you try to create a moody photo or cover your face, wear big sunglasses or worse some sort of costume, statistically, it will not work well. These people that look at the thumbnail don’t know you. They are trying to find people they find attractive and want to learn more about. If you’re online dating profile photo is just too arty or weird then it takes too much mental effort and they will simply move on. In addition, It’s virtually impossible to see a photo with the face or more importantly the eyes covered and make a judgement as to if that person is attractive or not.

    Safe the arty side for a few photos sprinkled in your online dating portfolio and maybe a few references in the written profile to encourage a conversation.

    Well, you might be the coolest guy or gal on the planet since all people have to go on is your online dating profile photo you might want to save the “cool factor“ until you meet them and initially just try to be pleasing and approachable so that you can move on to the next phase and start a conversation.

    Match.com Dating Profile Photos

    The Setting and Style

    So, where is the best place to take your profile picture? What’s the optimal style for a photo? Over the last 10 years, we’ve shot thousands of clients to see what works best.

    What we found is that lifestyle photos do better than traditional portrait photography or actor headshot type photos. Lifestyle usually means outdoors, in front of interesting architectural pieces, or in front of walls that give a dramatic background.

    The last thing you will want is a plain dark or plain white background that makes it look a bit too formal, serious and stuffy. Remember, this is not for your passport or driver’s license!

    Find a cool place to shoot. If the weather is not cooperating, then find someplace in your building, a friend’s building, a mall, or a public space where you can stop to catch a few photos.

    If you can shoot outdoors, then you’re sure to find a nice place to shoot! There are a couple of things that you should be mindful of. The sun is better than any artificial light, but there are better times to shoot than others. If you can, try to shoot 2 hours before sunset or 3 hours after sunrise. This is typically called the golden hour. The light is amazing!

    Shooting outdoors can be fantastic, but try not to shoot under a tree because it will give a blue tint to your photos. Fun fact, sunlight filtering through green tress will produce a blue cast and make you look fake and artificial.

     

    The Written Profile:

    OK, so now you’ve caught someone’s attention with your primary online dating photo, now What? Now you need to entice them first to read more about you and second to be open to starting a conversation with you. That’s the whole point. Unless you start a conversation, you are never going to get a match.

    Therefore, what you write in your online dating profile is almost as critical as your online dating photo. A fair number of online dating sites what you to have a “headline” in addition to several paragraphs “ about you”.

    The Headline

    For online dating sites that still use a headline you will want to follow some simple rules to make sure that people want to read more to get to know you.

    First of all you want to avoid any clichés like “Mr. Right looking for Ms. Right” or other lame pick-up lines you might find on the internet. Next you want to make sure you keep things positive. While your last relationship didn’t end well no one wants to see a headline like “Finally ready to try one more time” Holy Debbie Downer, Batman, who wants to meet that person, Yikes!

    Instead, think about your strong suits, what you’re good at and then be a bit clever, you can even try a bit of humor to spice things up. Don’t hesitate to jot a bunch or headlines down and then run them past your friends and family. You’d be surprised how people that know you well can contribute to your creativity.

    So, for instance, if you were very handy int eh kitchen you might try something along the lines of “Spice up your love life with an amazing cook!”

    Or if you were a gamer you could try something like “John 117 looking for his Cortana” ( … don’t worry, it’s a Microsoft HALO reference)

    If you wanted to try something more humorous you ‘d come up with a headline like “I’m not everyone’s cup of tea, but I’ll be your shot of tequila.”

    Perhaps you’re an unconventional person? You can try using a headline that says something like, “There’s plenty of fish in the sea, but I’m a Kraken!”

    Regardless, the written profile is a way of you expressing yourself but also gives you an opportunity to add “hooks” to your Online Dating Profile

    Online Dating Profile “Hooks”

    What is an Online Dating Profile Hook? A hook is a comment or description in your written dating profile that gives another person an opportunity to ask a specific question, add a comment or answer a question that you’ve posed in your written dating profile.

    “Hooks“ help intelligent people who read your profile to use in order to engage with you in a meaningful way. In addition, if you actively post questions in your written profile you make it easier for people that are interested in you to find a way to break the ice.

    Therefore, if you were interested in travel, you could mention your favorite vacation or place to travel followed by the question “so, what is the best vacation you’ve ever been on?“

    Questions such as these sprinkled in your profile 10 to start conversations more easily and thus increase the number of potential matches that you will get. Even the most handsome or beautiful person in the world may stumble in trying to determine the best way to initially engage with you if they don’t have a little help.

    Another important aspect we’ve seen with your online dating profiles is the “tone“ of your written profile that sets the stage for people who want to communicate with you. While it is important to be clear on what your goals are there is no need to be an open book nor to provide so much information that it swamps the other person.

    Be Specific

    Of course, if you are just interested in going out on dates then that should be clear if you’re looking for a long-term relationship you should make that clear if you’re just looking for some short term “hook-ups“ then it’s fair to be clear about what you want as well as some of your pet peeves.

    For a perfect online dating profile example make sure you’re clear about your likes and dislikes. Make it clear what you are looking for, so you don’t waste anyone’s time especially yours. Let’s be honest, we all have a “type” we’re attracted to whether its looks, attitude or behavior. It’s completely fair to make that known.

    Keep it Light

    Think of your profile as the beginning of a conversation. The old rule of “show, don’t tell” works great when you are talking to someone in person and it really works in a dating profile. If you write, “I really like animals” a fellow online dater may ask what animals you like or they may just absorb that fact but it won’t spark enough interest to inspire someone to contact you. But if you write about volunteering at an animal shelter or about how you train seeing-eye dogs, that will give them a fuller picture of who you are.Wired guide to Online Dating

    However, there is no need to go into politics, religion, or finances unless any of these are absolute deal breakers for you.

    We always adjust our clients that are on my dating profile should initially be more like cocktail party conversation as opposed to anything too deep or controversial that may turn off an otherwise good match for you. Don’t worry, there will be plenty of time to discuss the more important topics but at first, we’re just trying to create an environment where we can connect and start communicating to find out if there are any “sparks “

    Avoid Gripes

    There is no need to pretend to be more cheerful than you are, but if your profile includes a number of your pet peeves and turnoffs, you may not get the best responses. When someone scans a dating profile, they are looking for ways to connect–a lot of negativity may turn someone away because they don’t have enough information about what you do like.

    Many people add lines about how they ‘don’t want to play games.’ This is a legitimate desire, yet what they don’t realize is that it makes them seem wounded. Also, whether it is true of them or not, most people do not think of themselves as someone who ‘plays games’ so that disclaimer will not save you from being hurt.

    Dating Etiquette

    A little nod to dating etiquette. Here’s a little hard truth to go along with that. Not everyone is so honest on their profiles. In fact some people might be attracted to you even though your profile clearly states what you’re interested in and they know they don’t fit. They usually think that they can convince you to change your mind. Since this isn’t going to happen; it is fair to simply ignore these requests or offers to connect. There is no reason to engage with these individuals, as it’s not going to work out well for either of you.

    Once you follow these online dating examples and have created the perfect dating profile for you. It’s important to get it working for you. You might consider adding the profile to a number of different sites to maximize your dating strategy.

     

    Don’t be a Comedian

    In addition, we highly recommend that you don’t try to be too funny or witty in your online dating written profile as many times the context will be lost and while you believe you are being hilarious the other person comes off thinking that you are just “weird“.

    For example, we had a client in New York who’s written profile included a statement that he shared his apartment with “Rats the size of canned hams“. He thought this was hilarious and then could not understand why he was not getting many successful matches.

    Once we have an opportunity to retool his profile and provide great photos the number of matches he was presented went up astronomically. The moral of the story is that humor is based on context and sometimes a shared experience. Therefore, unless you’re a professional comedian or satirist, you might want to stay away of telling jokes or trying to be too funny in your written profile.

    Spelling and Grammar Count

    As unbelievable as it might seem, many people ruin their online dating profile because they never check their online dating written profile for spelling and grammar. While you don’t need to be Shakespeare, you also don’t want to look like an idiot with misspellings and poor grammar.

    In these online dating profile examples, we are all about creating the right first impression. You cannot very well do that if the person who was originally attracted to you enough to read your profile discovers that you didn’t even care enough to spell check your written profile before submitting it.

    Wired guide to Online DatingA poorly written online dating profile really leaves a bad taste in your mouth since you feel like you were ½ way to meeting the person only to find out they can’t spell. Very disappointing.

     

    The Online Dating Site Questionnaire:

    Nobody ever wished they had a longer questionnaire to fill out for their online dating p. However, if you are looking at the best online dating examples you have to include your Online dating questionnaire.

    Now most sites that still use online dating questionaries base it on an old personality test called the Meyers Briggs test, with a few custom variations thrown in. the process is about asking the same basic question in a variety of ways and then evaluating the results to determine what “general personality” you tend to have. This is used by the Online dating sites algorithm to match you with people the system thinks you’re compatible with based on your personality.

    This is tempered with your own asks and dislikes, as well as, your geographical area. Once everything is set up the system this will allow you to see all of the people that meet the criteria (in order of how active they are). This results in page after page of thumbnail images of people the system thinks you might be interested in.

    Therefore, you need to be honest and take the questionnaire seriously or the online dating sites’ algorithms which you’re paying for, by the way will try and match you with the wrong people.

    It’s simple. Make the algorithm happy so that you at least get in the ballpark of people that are interesting to you. Not filling out the questionnaire or doing partially or half-assed will seriously undermine your chances of success on the online dating site.

     

    Best Dating Profile Examples for Men

    After almost 10 years of experience we have seen “the good, the bad, and the ugly“ of online dating profiles. While not always the case, for some reason the majority of the men seem to struggle with their online dating profiles. Whether it’s the photos or the written profile all the way to starting and keeping a conversation going, men seem to have the most difficulty.

    When it comes to choosing the right photo for their primary online dating profile photo many men seem to think that “More is More”, more skin is what women want to see. However, both empirical evidence and statistics done by many of the online dating companies suggest that women in fact do not find the following photos attractive nor do they tend to elicit a favorable response:

    • men running on the beach without their shirts
    • men sitting in or standing next to their expensive sports cars
    • men sitting in or standing next to their expensive, luxury home
    • men pictured with attractive younger women.

    To list a few of woman’s pet peeves with men’s online dating profiles.

    The reason for the objection to the “shirtless photos“seems to revolve around the concept of “too much too soon“ while they definitely want to see images of you and full-body shots they can get a sense of your physique even when you’re fully dressed.

    As for photos of men next to luxury goods, apparently the consensus is that either you are “showing off“ which tends to be a bit of a turn-off or worse since I do not know you there is sometimes an assumption that the expensive luxury goods aren’t really yours.

    Remember, fakes abound on online dating sites and there is no reason to raise someone’s suspicion before you even had a chance to speak with them.

    It is far better to stick with the general Online dating profile example guidelines I’ve outlined for a successful online dating experience by choosing s great primary online dating profile photo.

    Complete your written dating profile with plenty of “hooks” to make starting a conversation easier. Finally, filling out your online dating profile with full body and ¾ body shots as well as, enough photos of you doing things you love; hiking, swimming, reading, biking etc.

    There will be plenty of time to demonstrate your wealth and intelligence once you actually entice someone to start a conversation with you and eventually meet with you.

    Online Dating Profile Samples

    Here are some great online dating profile photo samples for you to use and get a sense of how you might create your own online dating profile photo.

    These sample photos will give you an idea of what a successful online dating profile photo looks like so you can model your photo shoot to get a set of photos that is similar to these.

    FUN FACT: If you rotate your primary online dating profile photo every 7 to 10 days the Online dating sites algorithm will deem your profile to be “very active”. Ver active profiles tend to get moved higher in the search results which will give you a better chance to find better matches. The last thing you want is for your profile to always show up on the second or third page of 500 thumbnail images.

     

    Online Dating Profile Examples for Men

    Online Dating Profile Examples for Men

    Online Dating Profile Examples for Men

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

    Conversation Starters for Guys

    Ok, so now you’ve followed my advice and Dating Profile Examples to create the right profile for Match.com, eHarmony.com or  Zoosk.com etc. So now what do you do? It’s time to close the deal!

    Starting a conversation is not always as easy for many men as it is for women.

    Date texting, not sexting, seems to be the new norm for initiating a conversation with someone and is encouraged by most of the Online dating companies. However, date texting doesn’t come naturally to most men.

    Many men fall back on the “winks” waves” and other short cuts available on the online dating site. Don’t waste your time. These emoji-based contacts are not worth it and will not get you where you want to be. You want to make a great first impression, then stand out from the crowd. Make your personal brand a forceful one by being bold and making direct contact.

    Guys seem to be at a loss when it comes to date texting etiquette. Most men feel like they’re fumbling the ball when they text a new online date. Leaning how to text women successfully isn’t rocket science, but it does take a little finesse.

    Today we offer more tips on how men can look better online by honing their texting skills:

    First of all, skip the greeting. Texting “Hi. What’s up?” is lame and more likely to provoke a “delete” than a response. So, skip the greetings; they’re time-wasters. If you want them to respond to your text, text something interesting, observational or quirky that piques her curiosity or reveals something about your personality.

    Texting is flirting for online daters, so keep your comments fun and light. You can try something like:

    • “Tried that new sushi place for lunch; you’d love it!”
    • “Saw the craziest sign on the way to work today.”

    Another successful alternative is to actually read their profile and pick something out of it you can ask or comment on:

    • “Saw you hiked the Grand Canyon last month, what was your favorite place to stay?”
    • “You look like you know a lot about Biking, what’s the right bike for a beginner?”

    Show that you read their profile and you were engaged by it. Most people like it when you ask for their opinion.

    Good grammar and spelling is still important. Likewise, use complete words, not text speak. This isn’t high school. You have to create a sophisticated image if you want to attract someone as sophisticated as you.

    Remember to keep it clean, most people don’t respond well to profanity. If you’re trying to come off as a class act, swearing undercuts your image. OMG and WTF are the exceptions but use them judiciously.

    Keep them wanting more. Keep your texts short and sweet (easy to do when you’re limited to 240 characters) and, most importantly, infrequent. Never bombard someone with multiple daily texts.

    If you come on too strong, you’ll seem needy or aggressive. Too much too soon makes most people uncomfortable and can scare them away. Text only when you have something relevant to share and limit texts to a 2 or 3 a week at the beginning of a relationship.

     

    Know When to Quit

    Online dating is ruthless efficient because there is a certain amount of anonymity. This lack of actual face to face connection makes disconnecting that much easier as well. If you are trying to start a conversation with someone and they don’t respond after 2 attempts, then forget about it and move on. Remember online dating is a numbers game and you can’t get fixed on someone just because of their profile. Maybe they aren’t interested or maybe you found one of the stale profiles that the online dating companies routinely fail to remove. Either way you’re wasting your time.

    Let’s say, however, you’ve started a conversation with someone, and things are going pretty good and then they just stop, they “ghost you” or they block you. It happens and it’s nothing to get upset about. It’s just time to move on. If you’re following my advice, then you’re communicating with multiple people anyway and deciding whom is the best Match to ask out on a date. Ghosting is just part of the process. Besides it’s probably not you anyway it’s their issue. Just move on and find the right person for you.

     

    Best Dating Profile Example for Women

    Women have a much easier time with online dating statistically. While they traditionally make up about 50% of the members on an online dating site they tend to be able to put in less effort and still get a ton of activity. If you’re finding that your profile is not getting a lot of activity, then take a hard look at it and see if you’ve got the right photos and you’ve worked on your written profile and used the tips I’ve provided above.

    That said many women can get away with a single primary profile photo and a partially written profile simply because women tend to be pursued on online dating sites rather than the pursuers. The predominant trend in major online dating sites that specialize in heterosexual relationships incorporate this trend, right or wrong. While major online dating sites certainly allow same-sex searches and profiles, sites specifically devoted to same-sex or alt sex relationships are more efficient.

    (Note: I always suggest that our clients join 2 to 3 subscription-based online dating sites and maybe 1 niche site. This is true for all my same-sex clients as well)

    Therefore, we find that women can be more passive and still get a ton of offers to connect. This also allows them to be pickier.

    Yet, the profiles of women seeking men also have some pitfalls. For instance, if you have too few photos then your profile might be classified as a “fake” profile. Something to think about if you’re not getting a good deal of activity on your profile.

    In addition, women might tend to Glam up or try sexier photos to get attention. While one could assume that the sexier the photo the more interest/engagement you will get is a truth. In fact, the attention that you receive is rarely the kind that you want to date. This is especially true of men that find your profile via a geographic search that doesn’t necessarily meet your criteria. Online dating profile photos for women should follow the same criteria as outlined above if you want to get more appropriate matches.

    While it might be flattering to get 50 winks and comments, it’s not really moving you towards your goal of finding a great match.

    Another point that causes a good deal of anxiety and issues when you are following the online dating profile examples for women is the body type classification. Women and men have completely different interpretations of body style/composition, it is sometimes better to be more conservative in your body type definition as this can sometimes result in awkward situations.

    We believe everyone should be confident in their body, their age and their intelligence. However, online dating is a perfect example of competition and you do not want to waste your time when you can easily avoid that by recognizing that men may have a different definition of “athletic“, “Curvy “, “slim“. There’s nothing wrong with these definitions but you can save yourself a lot of heartache and rejection by recognizing this common misperception by men.

    You can use an impartial Artificial Intelligence (AI) tool like A.N.N.I.E to analyze your primary online dating photo to give you some feedback on your chosen photos and how others might perceive them and thus, you.

    Nevertheless, we always recommend that everyone include full body shots in their online dating portfolio because people have different tastes and perceptions of what is “Beauty“. Simply, posting full-body profile photos can make the whole process much more efficient and avoid miscommunication and awkward situations.

    You can use the online dating profile photo examples here to get an idea of the type on Online dating profile photos that tend to do well in online dating site searches.

    Use these dating profile examples to compose your own pictures to have the best chance of success.

    Online Dating Profile Examples for Women Online Dating Profile Examples for women Online Dating Profile Examples for women Online Dating Profile Examples for women

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

    Don’t Get Scammed

    Another reason to be a bit more efficient and to keep the right attitude when online dating and creating the perfect online dating profile is that there are a fair number of Scams associated with online dating. These can run the gamut from the intentional scam to scams involving Systemic negligence and finally to scams which I like to call “dating for profit” (no this is not the same as prostitution)

    Intentional Scams

    Romance scams are nothing new and you should be aware that they are big business. Hence you need to protect yourself and know what your options are.

    The first and best way to avoid these scams is to be on the lookout for fake online dating profiles. These are usually online dating profiles that have a few or even an single profile photo of a very attractive person and not much in the way of a written profile or a poorly written profile with poor grammar, spelling and sounds like it was not written by a native speaker.

    These profiles try and get you to focus on them and engage based on the hot profile photo alone. Once you start to communicate with them things usually move pretty fast.  The person running the scam usually tries to ingratiate themselves with you (and a whole lot of other people quickly. They want to “get to know you fast because they feel there is a real connection” “

    They usually can’t meet with you right away because they are traveling, or very important, or taking care of a sick grandmother. In a short while they will ask you for help, usually wiring some money to help out or for a plane ticket to come see you.

    All of this is BS. If you just learn to spot the fake online dating profiles right off the bat you will not waste your time with these scammers. Look for very lean profiles of people that are way “out of your league” that still want to connect with you.

    Remember people tend to match on parity and if you’re not a supermodel and a supermodel is infatuated with you it’s probably too good to be true. So steer clear.

     

    Online Dating Company Scams

    The next type of scam is a little less dangerous but still quite annoying. I’m talking about the propensity of online dating companies themselves to leave out of date abandoned and even canceled profiles alive on their site to make it seem that there are more potential matches than actually exist in your area.

    That is a nice spin on the problem. However, the FCC has fined Online dating companies, Like Match.com for deceitful practices. In addition, there may or may not have been a time when Online dating companies hired people to pretend to be online daters to get people whose subscription was about to expire to re-subscribe.

    So how can you guard against these shady online dating site practices? The easy answer is that you learn to identify fake profiles. Secondly you practice basic online dating etiquette; If you contact someone twice and they do not respond then just move on. There are a lot more “real” matches to be had than obsessing on a profile that will not respond to you.

    Dating for Fun & Profit Scams

    Watch for the “Danger Signs”! If that new person you just connected with immediately demands to be taken to dinner or other expensive activities (the theater, clubs concerts or events) chances are they are just using you. Unfortunately, a cottage industry has developed that I call “online dating for fun and profit”.

    Both sexes are guilty of this practice but a quick anecdote to make things clear. I have a friend that got into online dating early on and discovered that with a little cajoling she could get her newfound online dates to take her to the most expensive restaurants in New York City. Eventually she was going out on dates 4-5 times a week and always ordered enough food to make sure she had leftovers for tomorrow’s lunch.

    Within 18 months she had saved enough money on food expenses alone to buy a car and pay her New York rent…she also gained 10 LBs but she was laughing all the way to the bank.

    That is why I tell my clients to practice the “3-2-1 Rule”. When you find someone you’re interested in going out with making sure you have at least 3 online conversations. If things go well, ask for their phone number. If they agree then have 2 decent phone conversations to make sure you “click”. If these calls go well then ask the person out for a short, like 30-minute coffee date…this is practically what Starbucks was invented for.

    The point of the short meeting is to make sure the person is who they said they were, that they look reasonably close to their online dating profile photo and that you have some chemistry.

    If on the other hand the person you’re interested in wants to get right to the chase and have you taken them on an expensive date then you already know that they are more interested in money than spending time with you and it’s time to move on.

    Conclusion

    Online dating success is mostly a matter of perseverance and a really good online dating profile. The most successful online daters are the ones that understand that Online dating sites are simply a marketplace to match people together. When you join an online dating site you are in competition with others for the best matches available to you. Therefore, your one and only weapon in winning the competition and getting the best matches is your online dating profile.

    I’ve provided the very best online dating profile examples to help you increase your chances of success on any online dating site.  With millions of people looking for love online, your perfect match is out there; you just have to find each other.

    Too many online daters get frustrated and quit when the love of their life may be waiting just one click away. You can’t expect to send out a couple of contact requests and make an immediate connection. It doesn’t work that way.

    • You need to treat it as a fun adventure not a life and death experience. Therefore, you should be open to meeting new people even if they do not happen to be your ideal.
    • As I mentioned online dating is a numbers game. The more contacts you make, the more likely you are to find your special someone. When that happens, you don’t want to get tripped up by online dating etiquette and blow it. Follow these online dating tips and those in our previous posts) and online dating success will be yours!
    • Login to your online dating site 3 or 4 times a day to keep your profile active. You’ll get more contact responses if people think you’re currently logged in.
    • Guard your privacy. In the early stages of a relationship, it’s smart to limit contact. Don’t share emails and other contact information until you’re comfortable with the relationship.
    • Know when to bail. Online dating allows you to judge someone’s relationship potential without making a huge emotional investment. If you don’t feel the person is right for you, bailout. Be courteous and tell the person you’re going to stop contact, but you don’t need to go into details. If the person can’t take no for an answer, put a block on them.
    • Take it slow. Take your time to get to know each other before you propose a real date. Pushing for a date too soon makes you seem desperate. Exchange a few emails, spend time chatting online, become Facebook friends, share your daily experiences by trading Tweets, schedule cell phone dates. I usually recommend a 5-3-2 strategy: 5 chats, 3 emails, and 2 phone calls before you ask to meet in person.
    • Don’t rush; enjoy the process of revealing yourselves to each other. By the time you’re ready to ask for a date, you’ll already be friends and you’ll both be looking forward to spending time together.

    If you can follow these online dating examples and the suggestions outlined above you will have a much more enjoyable experience with online dating.

     

    About the Author:claire bahn

    Claire Bahn has over 15 years of working as a personal branding expert helping clients build authority and influence through their online profiles and social media accounts.

    Her background includes branding, public relations, Social Media and marketing, as well as, entrepreneurship. She has a passion to help executives, entrepreneurs and influencers strategize and create their best personal brand.

    She is currently the CEO and Co-founder of Online Profile Pros and Stratus Branding. Ms. Bahn recognizes that first impressions are made online and the fastest way to achieving your goals is by taking command of your personal brand through your online profiles and social media. She started Online Profile Pros and Stratus Branding to help individuals create, maintain and protect their personal brands so that they achieve the authority, influence and trust the need to succeed at online dating or their job search.

    She’s been featured in numerous publications and news outlets including Forbes and Entrepreneur magazines.

    Ms. Bahn is a former model and actress, appearing in national ad campaigns for major retailers. An avid fashion/lifestyle blogger she’s a recognized influencer. Ms. Bahn holds a BA from the University of Texas at Austin and currently lives in the Hollywood Hills in Los Angeles, CA with her 2 red miniature pinchers, Beau and Trixie.

Claire Bahn

Author

Claire Bahn is the CEO and Co-Founder of Online Profile Pros (OPP). She founded OPP to help individuals build, maintain and protect their personal brand to help them get the jobs, promotions and dates they desire. She has 15 years experience in branding, public relations and event marketing at start-ups as well as large Fortune 500 companies like Rueters and SAP. Claire has been featured in Forbes, Entrepreneur magazines among others. Online Profile Pros helps executives, entrepreneurs & influencers strategize and create their best personal brand.

https://onlineprofilepros.com/
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